Well I would suggest that you try it again, follow the instructions to the letter and a step at a time. But, before doing so make copy the avast5.ini and save it somewhere you can find it again, should you need to replace it.
Setting the updates to Ask, honestly won't make much difference as avast would still be checking for updates (but not downloading them) in order to Ask you. You can get rid of the ! over the icon by changing the AvastUI, Settings, Status Bar, Components Monitored, uncheck the Definitions auto updates option.